At last

I have finally said it at last..
and have done what I do must..
but why does it still feel so wrong..
is it really ok if she is gone?

I read what I said a dozen times atleast
No tears or Regret any time..in me
Is it really that we are now free?
or Did I just lose another part of me?

she was like cancer spreading in my veins..
not killing me but making me feel alive again..
it wasnt a pain of sorrow.. but a satisfactory pain..
yet I let her go… cause this was all in vain..

my heart is no more
my mind tells me to fuck off..
maybe she could have saved my soul
but I am not even a human.. I have no accessible doors..

she would stand in the cold all the time
looking for refuge in this heart of mine..
and I could just look at her, with no idea to do..
I have no doors to open.. I have no screws to loose

my Windows are all shattered
yet I cant climb out and jump to the ground
It’ll itch and it’ll hurt, the pieces will pierce me like a spear..
I am really sorry.. there is nothing I can do my dear..

I am too hurt to stand again..
I do the have the courage to go through all that pain..
I just dont believe that something this amazing could ever happen to me..
So I’ll just run away, and be with you in my dreams πŸ™‚

You are no simple girl
you stand apart from them all
not in a good way or a bad way..
but one day for you.. I will even crawl
I will bang at your doors.. and beg you to let me in your arms..
cause there is nowhere else, Ill feel as calm

As the sun rises tomorrow
and as the moon disappears in the light..
when the faithful day comes in my lifetime..
I will surely ask you to be mine πŸ™‚

I know what I said,
I know what I did..
I should be gone by now
Yet I am typing this shit

I could go on forever
Till the last breath I inhale πŸ™‚
But I am going to stop for now..
I’m sorry that I failed πŸ™‚

last_waltz_by_yourforgiveness-d353ums

—End—

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